The joy of having children is unparalleled. Even when there are disagreements between husband and wife, the true brightness in their lives comes through the arrival of a child. After facing countless adversities outside, when parents return home and see their child’s face, hear their voice, or sit beside them, all sorrows fade away, and life becomes as beautiful as stars shining next to the moon. However, those who are compelled by work to stay away from their children or must keep their children away from them truly understand the pain of being without them. While fathers might manage to stay apart, mothers cannot eat or sleep when separated from their children. Life feels unbearably harsh during such times.
For a mother who must live alone despite having children, no substitute on Earth can fill the void in her life. The reality of a childless mother is far harsher than it seems. Yet, circumstances often force individuals to surrender. Children are sometimes left with in-laws or cared for by strangers. Can anyone in this world care for a child with the same love and attention as their mother? Is it even possible? A mother constantly worries about her child’s well-being—whether they’ve eaten, what they’re doing, or if they’re crying. How many mothers can truly focus on work while their child is away?
And what about the child without their mother? A child without their mother’s presence is as helpless as a child in a war-torn land like Syria. The demands a child places on their mother, the comfort they find in her scent—these cannot be replaced by anyone else in the world. When parents can’t share stories with their children, smell their scent, or hold their hands to teach them to walk, a distance forms between them. Even video calls cannot fill the void; they only amplify the longing. There is no greater satisfaction than holding your child close as they sleep. Parents can bury their deepest sorrows simply by looking at their child’s face. Even in the depths of despair, they can choose to live for the sake of their child.
Even after crossing half a lifetime, I deeply feel the absence of my mother. Yet, why must parents live apart from their children, especially those tender infants who depend entirely on their care? Do all parents who stay away from their children have valid reasons? Is it always necessary for both parents to work? Who will make the sacrifice? In this debate, everyone wants to uphold their self-identity and pride, but the child loses out. Deprived of love and care, an infant grows up almost like an orphan. When the child eventually reflects on their childhood and questions their parents, will the parents have an adequate justification?
Even if life has fewer resources or financial constraints, let children grow up in the arms of their parents. If a child, deprived of their parents in their formative years, does not stand by them in their old age, will society blame the child? Perhaps the increase in retirement homes is inevitable. The future happiness of parents seems uncertain. Denying a child their rightful childhood for the sake of wealth will lead to regret. A child’s childhood and adolescence do not return a second time, and a parent’s affection never diminishes.
Those of us chasing wealth, fame, or other pursuits while leaving our children behind may ultimately fail if our children, neglected by our absence, go astray. More important than self-identity or independence is the touch of a child and nurturing them with care and love. If parents fail to fulfill their duty to their children, they will have to answer to their Creator. The pain of children who cry themselves to sleep in the absence of their parents is perhaps something only those same parents can truly comprehend.
