The Lure of Marriage: Deception, Responsibility, and Justice in Law

Engaging in sexual relations under the false promise of marriage is punishable by up to seven years in prison—firmly stated by the law. However, many are raising their voices against this law. What does that suggest? That some want physical intimacy validated solely by a promise of marriage. Alright then—let’s not argue that point for now. But what about the betrayal after giving such a promise? Shouldn’t that deception also be punishable? Perhaps this seven-year sentence is more about punishing the betrayal than the act itself. Breaking someone’s trust and disrespecting a solemn promise isn’t a minor offense by any means.

Public discussions online suggest this law has become controversial. The so-called “intellectuals” argue: if consensual sex happens under a marriage promise, but marriage doesn’t follow—and there’s no rape allegation—then it’s all good? Really? Is that the kind of freedom we want to offer our youth? We’re making marriage so complicated that now everyone just wants a shortcut to intimacy. While families might delay marriage until someone is “settled,” the mind and body don’t always wait. And sadly, our younger generation lacks the moral strength to wait too. Let’s be honest—so did their parents.

No one wants to address the root of the problem.

If someone misleads another with the promise of marriage and then abandons them, and a rape allegation follows—why is only the man held accountable by law? Was the woman not a consenting adult? The man didn’t drag her off to a hotel in Cox’s Bazar against her will. If there was no consent, then yes—it’s absolutely rape, and no promise of marriage is needed to define it as such. But if it was consensual and based on false hope, then why is only the man punished? Shouldn’t the woman also face some legal accountability? Maybe not equally—but isn’t half the responsibility hers too? That would at least be a step toward balanced justice.

Think about what happens after such a relationship ends without marriage: the woman marries another man who knows nothing of her past. The man does the same. Where’s the honesty? Where does the trail of deception end? Frankly, a seven-year sentence might even seem lenient in such cases.

Sure, many men pressure for sex—but no act can be completed without a woman’s consent. Even a beast couldn’t force that without resistance. So, if such a thing is forced, that’s undeniably rape—and the only appropriate punishment for rape should be capital punishment.

Whether it’s rape by deception or rape by force—there must be a clear statute of limitations. You can’t be in a live-in relationship for three years, and then suddenly, two years later, file a rape case. That’s abuse of the law and needs to be stopped. Preferably, immediately.

This law—punishing a man with seven years in prison for so-called “rape by marriage promise”—can actually be viewed as disrespectful and degrading toward women. Because, in nearly every such case, the relationship is consensual. Later, if there’s a grudge, or a breakup, or a desire to take revenge—a rape case is filed. And yes, there have been real-life cases where such manipulation happened. Of course, some genuine victims have also been denied justice. There’s mental instability on all sides.

Islam clearly outlines the punishment for premarital sexual relations. These punishments, if properly studied and justly implemented, could help wipe out both rape and adultery. Society would be freed from much of its moral decay. Women wouldn’t have to rely on their bodies to survive anymore.