Have you ever noticed how, as a nation, we struggle to celebrate others’ success? Yet, we take secret pleasure in someone’s downfall. It doesn’t matter whether we achieve anything significant in life—if a friend lands a great job, an acquaintance prospers, or someone we know earns a little more money, we instantly feel deflated. On the other hand, if we hear about someone’s misfortune—their business failing, their salary being cut off, or even their life crumbling—we feel an unspoken sense of satisfaction. We may put on a mask of sympathy, but deep down, we rejoice. This is not just an individual problem; it is a national crisis.
We envy a neighbor’s beautiful wife, a colleague’s expensive car, or a friend’s new house. We secretly curse their success, wondering, How did that guy get so lucky? While the success of strangers doesn’t bother us as much, the prosperity of someone we know can make us lose sleep. A friend’s promotion feels like a personal defeat, and hearing about someone moving ahead in life fuels our frustration. Often, we don’t just want to succeed—we want to succeed more than others. Shockingly, we even take pleasure in imagining people we know struggling, failing, or being humiliated. If our hidden thoughts were exposed, even animals would be disgusted by our cruelty. And yet, we continue to nurture this toxic mentality, pretending to be good while secretly battling our own demons.
There’s an old saying about our kind of envy: “God, make me blind in one eye if it means my neighbor loses both.” In rural Bangladesh, there are stories of people selling their cattle just to bribe officials and block a neighbor’s son from getting a job. We see people renting cars to travel miles just to spread false rumors and break off a girl’s engagement. The way we speak about others when they are not around is enough to measure our collective moral decay. We may take pride in our heritage, culture, and achievements, but this deep-seated jealousy is a disease that taints our national character.
As a society, we are deeply infected with envy. Even among siblings, friends, and colleagues, when someone prospers, we struggle to be genuinely happy for them. Outwardly, we smile and congratulate them, but inwardly, we feel restless and bitter. The truth is, we don’t just want to climb the ladder of success—we want to ensure that no one climbs higher than us. This toxic mindset is masked under societal norms, forcing us to pretend to be happy for others while secretly harboring resentment. It’s a form of collective mental illness, but since almost everyone has it, we don’t acknowledge it. Still, we all know it exists.
Is There a Cure?
Yes, but it requires conscious effort. The first step is to focus on our own growth instead of comparing ourselves to others. We must resist the urge to let envy and resentment take control of our lives. Easier said than done, right? But there’s a way forward. Surrounding ourselves with positive, generous people can help. Reading good books, watching inspiring movies, and engaging in meaningful discussions can slowly reshape our mindset. More importantly, reconnecting with spirituality and ethical values can guide us toward inner peace.
Healing from this collective sickness won’t happen overnight. It’s deeply embedded in our blood, in our culture. But change begins with small steps—one thought at a time, one action at a time. The purpose of true education is to refine our character and help us grow into better human beings. If each of us works on this change within ourselves, gradually, society as a whole will transform.
This message isn’t just for Bangladesh—it applies everywhere, including Canada. Here, multiculturalism teaches us to appreciate diversity, celebrate success, and support each other. Instead of pulling others down, we can learn to lift each other up. True success isn’t about being ahead of others—it’s about becoming the best version of ourselves. Let’s take that step together.
