“I have a family” is not an argument for neglecting women’s responsibilities

I have a family – social media is very active campaigning against it. Girls who don’t want to take responsibility of their parents are bypassing this pretext. Shamima, an official of a private bank, cannot stop laughing after seeing such pictures on Facebook.

He said, there is a girl who shrugs off her parents’ responsibility with these three words. Family life is about one era. Mother has been with me for ten years. There is no father, the brothers are busy with their own lives. My family belongs to my mother. I was able to go to the office safely because the mother took care of the children. Mother’s body is not good now. Regular attendance at the doctor’s court is required. I do everything myself. My husband is also supportive. Remind the mother when she needs to take any medicine. Where did I not say that I have a family? Even though my in-laws come from the village, I do not make any mistakes in my duties. If I can handle everything equally, there is no disturbance.

One such Nadia. After the marriage, when the child is born, the mother-in-law goes to her daughter. It is difficult to manage his family. Then he brought his mother. Since then, Nadia’s trust is in her mother. Father is struggling with his younger brother. Even then, you never openly say send your mother. He himself came to Dhaka and visited his grandchildren.

Neela (pseudonym), loan department officer of private City Bank, recently visited India with her mother. As she got a long leave, she left her children with her husband and came out with her mother. The mother who lost her father to Corona tries not to feel lonely. Out of father-in-law.

It is a picture of a section of society. In this patriarchal society, a woman makes very few decisions about the family. There it may be easier for a working woman to take on the responsibilities of parenthood. But a housewife. Many times she avoids it thinking about her husband’s income. It depends on the financial solvency. When a woman herself is dependent, she is not able to provide shelter to her parents.

In the context of our country, there was a time when grandmothers were happy when their grandchildren came to their laps, and when they died, they could lift the cot on their shoulders and take them to the grave. And the parents are happy to think of old age as the custodians or as bearers of the lineage. But with time that picture has changed. Now many people consider the girl as the treasure of Yaksha. In old age, they are the ones who take over the responsibility of the parents, see and listen.

Nilufar Ahmed, a freelance gender and management consultant, said, “There has been a lot of change in the mindset of women these days. Not only that, our society’s attitude towards women has also changed. Girls are now pioneers in taking any responsibility. Don’t back down on the excuse of the world to fulfill your responsibilities to your parents. There are some exceptions due to various environmental problems, but girls are now largely ahead in fulfilling the responsibilities of elderly parents.’

Society does not pay much attention to anything about women. Negative faults have to be found. Many parents have to stay younger in the society because they live in the daughter’s family. But there is no criticism if the son is left in the old age home.

In the midst of the Corona virus, it has been seen that many elderly parents have been left on the streets for fear of serving. Again, if you open the pages of the newspaper, it is often seen that the mother of an educated or high-ranking official is begging. An example of which is the old beggar Salemun Necha of Mymensingh who went viral in 2020. Again, many children are sent abroad for higher education by parents with their own money. Many of them do not return to the country, forget about the parents’ debt. The news of such neglected parents comes across the pages of daily newspapers. Many children feel burdened when their parents reach old age. Looks like trouble. As a result, many parents end up living in nursing homes. This discussion is different. But it is not correct that women do not want to take responsibility of parents on the pretext of ‘I have a family’. Women never shirk from their duties. Our society has also started to break the mentality that girls become after marriage. And this is possible due to strong will power of women.